Tuning Out the Noise of Others’ Opinions
- Deborah Ann Martin
- 9 hours ago
- 4 min read
When I got divorced, I moved to West Virginia for a job opportunity. I was loosing my house, my job and my car had every check engine light on it. I had no heat in the car. Everything in my life was uncertain.
I didn’t know what the job would be; I have a lot of skill sets, and they didn't know which area they wanted to place me. I didn't know where I’d live, or how things would unfold for me and my two boys. I knew no one there.
All I knew was that I wanted to start fresh and be able to afford to take care of my kids. But I HAD to trust God 100% to guide me through it.
People thought I had lost my mind. They assumed I was stressed from the divorce, running away from my problems, and making an impulsive decision.
But the truth is, I wasn’t running from something, I was running to something.
That move was the start of me learning to listen to the only two voices that mattered: God’s and my own.
The Difference Between Running Away and Running Toward
When your life falls apart, people have opinions. Lots of them.
They’ll tell you what they think you should do, how they think you should feel, and what choices they think make sense. But those people aren’t living your life. They don’t wake up in your body, carry your burdens, or walk your path.
Moving to West Virginia was my leap of faith. I didn’t have a clear plan, just peace in my heart that it was where I was supposed to go. It didn’t make sense to everyone else, but it didn’t have to.
And the more I trusted that peace, the more I saw God’s hand in the details. The right job appeared. The right home. The right community.
Sometimes the best decisions don’t make sense to the world because they weren’t meant for them, they were meant for you.
Learning to Filter and Tuning Out Others’ Opinions
Over the years, I’ve realized that people will always have opinions, but I get to choose which ones I let in.
When my children suggest something for me to do, I stop and think:
Is this something I truly want?
Is this right for me?
Sometimes the answer is yes because I choose to do it out of love, even if it costs me time or money. Other times, I say no, not because I don’t care, but because I need to care for myself too.
That’s what growth looks like: choosing intentionally, not automatically saying yes to please someone else.
If advice or criticism doesn’t make my life better, I don’t need it.
If someone’s “opinion” leaves me feeling small, anxious, or doubting myself, I’ve learned to step back and ask, Is this about me, or is it about them?
Most of the time, it’s about them.
The Freedom in Listening to Yourself
There’s peace that comes when you realize you don’t owe everyone an explanation.
You don’t have to defend your dreams, your healing, your career, your faith, or your timing. The people meant for you will support you even when they don’t fully understand.
Learning to listen to yourself, that quiet, calm voice that whispers truth beneath all the noise, that’s where confidence is born.
When I stopped living to make other people comfortable, I started building a life that felt right for me.
And that’s when joy came back.
God’s Guidance Over People’s Opinions
I’ve learned to trust that when God gives me peace about something, that’s my permission to move forward.
When I made that move after my divorce, I didn’t have certainty, I had faith. And faith doesn’t mean knowing the plan. It means trusting the Planner.
Sometimes God calls you into uncomfortable or uncertain places because He’s positioning you for something better. If you wait for everyone to approve of your choices, you’ll miss your blessings.
Faith isn’t about what people say, it’s about what your spirit knows.
What You Can Try Today
Pause before reacting. Ask, “Is this advice helpful or hurtful?”
Pray for clarity. Let God’s peace guide your choices.
Notice patterns. If someone constantly criticizes, protect your space.
Say no without guilt. It’s your right to choose what’s right for you.
Remember your purpose. You’re not here to please everyone.
Surround yourself with encouragers. Choose people who build, not break.
Reflect before accepting advice. Not every opinion deserves a seat in your life.
Thank those who mean well. But follow your heart, not their fears.
Celebrate your wins quietly. You don’t owe the world your progress report.
Listen to the still small voice. It’s often the truth you’ve been missing.
Living with Your Own Approval
There’s something freeing about reaching a point where you don’t need everyone to agree with your decisions.
I used to second-guess everything, waiting for reassurance or permission. Now, I remind myself that other people don’t get to live with my choices. I do.
And if I can look back and say I made that choice with honesty, prayer, and peace, then I know I’m right where I’m supposed to be.
So tune out the noise. Trust your instincts. Follow the peace.
The world may not understand your journey, but it wasn’t meant to. It was meant for you.
Support on Your Journey
If this message spoke to your heart, I’d love for you to keep walking this road with us. Join the Surviving Life Lessons Community Groups, a safe space to share your reflections, ask questions, and grow alongside others who are learning to love themselves again.
And if you ever need someone to simply listen, visit our Neighbor Chat Service. We’re not counselors—we’re just people listening to people. Sometimes all you need is a reminder that someone cares.
Keep walking in light. Keep believing in yourself.
And remember, this isn’t the end of your journey.
It’s the beginning of becoming the person you were always meant to be.
About the Author:
Deborah Ann Martin is the founder of Surviving Life Lessons, a published author, poet, speaker, and trainer with over 20 years of management experience across multiple industries. An MBA graduate, U.S. veteran, single mother, and rare cancer survivor, Deborah brings both professional expertise and lived experience to her writing on resilience, leadership, personal growth, and overcoming adversity. Her mission is to empower others with practical wisdom and real-life insight to navigate life’s challenges with strength and purpose.
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