Relearning What You Enjoy
Updated: 5 days ago
There’s something powerful about rediscovering joy, that simple, genuine kind of happiness that comes from doing things you actually love, not just what’s expected of you.
For a long time, I didn’t even think about what I enjoyed. Life had been about responsibility, work, family, survival. There wasn’t time to stop and ask, What makes me happy?
But once I started rebuilding my life, I decided to find out.
Trying New Things (and Loving Them)
It started with saying yes to little adventures.
I tried kayaking one weekend and I fell in love with it. There’s something about gliding across the water, feeling the sun, and just being surrounded by peace that fills me with life. It’s calm and freeing at the same time.
Then, I made it a point to find something fun to do at least once every weekend. It didn’t have to be big or expensive. It just had to make me smile.
Some weekends it was exploring a new place, sometimes it was cooking something new, and sometimes it was just relaxing and watching the grandkids play. The goal wasn’t to impress anyone. It was to fill my own cup.
Discovering Joy in Creativity While Relearning What You Enjoy
Another piece of joy came when I started writing again.
I began putting my poems into books, writing blogs, and sharing my story. What started as therapy, a way to heal from pain, turned into something I truly love. Writing helps me process, connect, and give hope to others who might be hurting.
It also makes me proud.
For so many years, I kept my words to myself, thinking they weren’t good enough or that no one would care. Now I know better. When I write, I feel like I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be.
Stepping Out of My Comfort Zone
I’ll be honest, the social media part still makes me uncomfortable.
Putting myself out there publicly, promoting my books and blogs, is something I never imagined doing. But I also know that for people to find this message, they have to know I exist.
So, I push myself. I post, I share, I connect. And every time I do, I get a little more confident. It’s not about fame or numbers, it’s about helping people heal through words, and knowing that maybe one sentence might make someone feel less alone.
Sometimes joy comes with a little discomfort. Growth always does.
Learning That It’s Okay to Have Fun
For a while, I thought fun was something you had to earn, that I could only enjoy myself once the work was done, once everyone else was happy, once the chores were finished.
But that’s not how life works. There will always be more to do.
So now, I make joy a priority. I make time for it. Because the truth is, fun isn’t a luxury. It’s fuel. It keeps you from burning out, from forgetting why life is worth living.
When I started choosing joy intentionally, not waiting for it to show up, but creating it, I realized that happiness isn’t something you find. It’s something you build.
What You Can Try Today
Try something new. It can be as simple as a new food, hobby, or place.
Make a fun list. Write down things that bring you joy, old and new.
Do one fun thing each week. Even ten minutes counts.
Say yes more often. Especially to experiences that make you nervous in a good way.
Get outside. Nature has a way of waking up joy.
Be creative. Paint, write, sing, plant, or build something just for fun.
Let go of guilt. You don’t need permission to be happy.
Invite others in. Share joy — it multiplies when it’s shared.
Document your moments. Take pictures or journal about your experiences.
Celebrate the small stuff. Every spark of joy matters.
Falling in Love with Life Again
Relearning what you enjoy is like rediscovering color after living in gray.
I don’t live for the weekends, but I do make sure every week includes something that makes me smile. I find joy in creating, writing, exploring, and even stepping into new challenges like social media, because each of those things reminds me I’m alive and still growing.
I love my life now. It’s not perfect, but it’s mine.
And that joy — that peace that comes from living authentically — is worth every single uncomfortable step it took to find it..
Where to Go From Here
Relearning what you enjoy is easier when you are not doing it alone. At Surviving Life Lessons, we believe in life survivors helping life strugglers. Our Personal Growth and Healing group is a place to grow with others on the same path, and our Self-Esteem & Confidence Support Group can help you rebuild how you see yourself. You can also browse our Community Groups Catalog to find every group that fits where you are right now.
Next, read Reconnecting with Yourself: Learning to Like Who You Are Again or Spending Time Alone Without Feeling Lonely.
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About the Author:
Deborah Ann Martin is the founder of Surviving Life Lessons, a published author, poet, speaker, and trainer with over 20 years of management experience across multiple industries. An MBA graduate, U.S. veteran, single mother, and rare cancer survivor, Deborah brings both professional expertise and lived experience to her writing on resilience, leadership, personal growth, and overcoming adversity. Her mission is to empower others with practical wisdom and real-life insight to navigate life’s challenges with strength and purpose.
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