Leading Through Layoffs and Survivor's Guilt

Letting someone go doesn’t mean letting go of responsibility.

Letting someone go is one of the hardest parts of being a supervisor. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been managing people or how many times you’ve had to do it, it never gets easy. And when it’s a layoff, not a termination, the emotional toll is even heavier.

I’ve lived it more than once. I’ve been the one who had to deliver the news. I’ve also been the one who knew it was coming and wasn’t allowed to say anything. I’ve looked at people who trusted me, who built something with me, who had families to support, and I had to be the one to end their role. Not because they did anything wrong, but because the company made a decision.

Layoffs Aren't Personal, But They Feel Personal

There’s a big difference between firing someone for misconduct and laying someone off due to budget or reorganization. When someone violates a clear policy and your hands are tied, it's easier to justify. You still feel the weight of the decision, especially when they’re a decent person who made a bad choice, but you know the responsibility lies with them.

Layoffs are different. They often come from higher up. They come with rules about what you can say and when. And even if you've known for weeks or months, you're not allowed to prepare your team. You're asked to smile, to keep morale up, to keep projects moving all while knowing that you're about to deliver news that will break someone’s world.

That is a weight that supervisors carry quietly.

The Emotional Whiplash of a Layoff Day

You might start your day checking emails, attending meetings, trying to keep things normal. Then you get the call from HR: it's time. You're walked through the script. Maybe they give you a checklist. Maybe you're told not to deviate. You feel like a robot delivering something that feels deeply personal.

You walk someone into a room. You give them the news. Sometimes they cry. Sometimes they sit in stunned silence. Sometimes they lash out in anger or betrayal. And you take it. Because you know it's not really about you. But it still feels like it is.

Then they leave and you're still there.

Survivor's Guilt Is Real

When people talk about the aftermath of layoffs, they often focus on the person who was let go. But there’s not enough said about the ones who stayed behind.

Supervisors often carry survivor's guilt. You ask yourself:

• Why did I stay and they didn’t?

• What could I have done differently?

• How do I motivate a team that just lost their work family?

You may feel relieved to still have your job, but that relief comes with grief, stress, and guilt. It’s like being in the eye of the storm. Everything is quiet for a moment, but you know more is coming.

Rebuilding After the Fallout

The first few days after a layoff are eerily quiet. People avoid eye contact. No one wants to laugh too loudly. The desks are emptier. The vibe has changed. It’s not business as usual.

As a supervisor, this is when your real work begins. You become part coach, part counselor, part cheerleader. You meet with team members one-on-one. You give space for people to vent. You listen. You validate.

You also rally. You remind them that you’re still here. That the work is still valuable. That their contributions matter. And that while the team may look different, it can still be strong.

Sometimes I would bring in pizza. Sometimes I’d just show up early and be available. The point wasn’t the food it was the reminder that someone still cared. That someone was steering the ship, even if the waters were rough.

The Weight of Having to Know in Advance

One of the hardest experiences is when you know a layoff is coming but you're told not to say anything. You attend team lunches. You laugh with your people. And in your head, you're screaming, "They have no idea."

I’ve known about layoffs a month before they happened. I’ve been asked to assign final projects and performance reviews, knowing it wouldn’t matter. I’ve had to put on a brave face while carrying the burden of that knowledge.

It's isolating. And it takes a toll.

But this is also where ethics and leadership come in. I couldn’t stop the decision. But I could control how it was delivered. I could control my compassion. I could speak the truth in a kind way. And I could be available afterward.

Motivation Plummets After Layoffs

When your team loses coworkers, friends, mentors the energy disappears. People are shell-shocked. They’re scared. They start asking, "Am I next?"

Motivation tanks. And who can blame them?

This is where you double-down on communication. You clarify what is known and acknowledge what isn’t. You tell the truth. You reinforce purpose. And you become transparent with your own role and how you're advocating for them.

You also reframe priorities. You don’t act like everything is the same. You revisit timelines. You redistribute work fairly. You check in often

And most of all, you see your people

The Importance of Grace

Not everyone handles layoffs with grace. Some leaders hide. Some overcompensate by pushing harder. Some pretend nothing happened

But your people notice everything

The way you walk into a room. The way you acknowledge (or ignore) their emotions. The way you handle your own grief. All of it communicates more than any email ever could.Grace looks like:

• Saying, "This is hard. And we’ll get through it together."

• Letting someone step away for a few minutes without judgment

• Being honest about what hurts, without losing professionalism

• Celebrating small wins to slowly rebuild morale

  
  

What to Do After a Layoff

1. Hold space for emotions

   • Create time for check-ins. Let people feel what they feel.

2. Redistribute with intention

   • Don’t just dump work. Talk through what can be paused, shifted, or delegated.

3. Communicate consistently

   • Even if there’s no update, say that. Silence breeds fear.

4. Rebuild rituals

   • Bring back routines. Celebrate birthdays. Share donuts. Normalize the new team.

5. Stay available

   • Be visible. Walk the floor. Invite conversation.

     
     

Closing Thoughts

Being a supervisor during layoffs is like being a lighthouse during a storm. You don't stop the waves, but you can be a guide.

It’s okay to grieve. It’s okay to feel the loss. But the team that stays needs to be reminded of their value, their purpose, and their path forward.

Layoffs may be part of business, but leadership is how we walk people through it.

You can do it with kindness. You can do it with courage. And you can do it without losing your humanity.

Support for Supervisors

If you’re navigating layoffs, rebuilding trust, or carrying survivor’s guilt, you're not alone. We offer:

• Peer groups for supervisors to share strategies and support

• Neighbor Chat for quick one-on-one support

• Next Step Coaching to help you build a plan for moving forward

Visit SurvivingLifeLessons.com to get the support you deserve.

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